Break The Habit.

I have a bad habit. I am a habitual flaker. People invite me to things and I'll say “I'm gonna try to make it.” Knowing good and well that I'm not gonna make any effort to go. My close friends know this about me. They expect me not to show up, and are surprised if I do. I'm even worst when it comes to making plans, I just don't like them. I can't predict if I'm going to feel like doing something days in advance, so instead of having to come up with a reason not to, I just don't commit.

I do my best flaking when friends come into town. I don't know why, I just do. I hate entertaining people, I'd rather just chill. I have been doing this pretty consistently now since I have lived in LA and now in the DMV. I feel like when people come to town they want to kick it hard and I really can't match their desire to kick it.  

So Friday I received a text from one of my boys from High School, David. He now lives in Boston and is a middle school history teacher.  I haven't seen him in at least 5 years. Since I've had the same phone number since I first got a cell phone when I was about 15, it's not hard for my old friends to get in touch with me. Dave said that he would be in town for the weekend and wanted to link up. I immediately thought about flaking again. I planned on having a boring, uneventful weekend, but something was telling me that I needed to see him this weekend. I figured that I would at least call him and see what he had going on. I called Dave and we played phone tag Friday night, but I knew that I was staying in the house anyway.  

He called me the next afternoon and I said fuck it, Dave is my boy, it's time to break my habit. I stopped being fake busy and picked up the phone. He said that he would be going to the MLK Memorial. I haven't been to the memorial yet and I've been wanting to go, I told him that I would meet him there. 

The memorial is amazing. It's so powerful. I was there in awe of the statue, when I heard my boy singing reggae behind me. It was so good to see Dave. We had some great times over the years, and some crazy stories that will not be mentioned in this entry. Until I saw him again, I had forgotten how close we were. He's my boy fareal fareal. (You know it's serious when you add that second fareal)

I'm not going to give the play by play of our day kicking it, but we had a great time. We went to the Wizards playoff game, had some BBQ, talked about the good old days and our present days and futures. I was inspired and motivated by the conversations that we had. We still have a lot in common and it was great hearing about his journey and sharing mine. It didn't feel like 5 years had passed at all. It was just like the good old days back at his mom's house in the early 2000's.  It was one of the best days that I've had in a long time. I had no idea how much good seeing a familiar face and a real friend of mine would be for me. I felt re-energized after hanging with Dave. 

I also felt bad for all the flaking that I've done over the years. I've got some really great friends, I consider most of them to be my family. Friendship is one of the most valuable things that we have in this life. Having somebody that genuinely cares about your well-being and enjoys your company is rare. My friends know me as well as anybody, even my family. They've seen me at my best and my worst and still love me. I've been blessed with great friends and I've foolishly missed out on some great opportunities to make memories with them. So from here on out, I'm gonna make a real effort to be a better friend. I owe that much to my people. I'm gonna do better.